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Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Bend over and cough...

So this is my blog about border wars, most specifically travel through the US/CANADA border.  Now I only have experience with the BC crossings but since the guards are federal employees, I think its a good sampling of what goes on over there.

Recently I had to cross the border, I had all the documentation ready, answers for their questions ie:where are you going, how long will you be there, are you transporting any live reptiles or illegal immigrants...  Its weird because sometimes the border guards, and I am talking about both countries here, can ask where you are going and send you on your way.  My father has been known to say we went to California, were gone for two weeks and we had purchased nothing in the states.  Forget that it was August and school clothes were needed, take into account the two girls bikes we had in the back of the van taking up a huge chunk of room with my sister, I and my grandmother, .  Nope the guard looked at my father's apparently innocent face and said right, on your way then...    Other  times the guards will pull you over, take apart your car with no explanation.  I guess not everybody can be an Eddy.

Here are some things I have learned.
1. Have your passport ready!  You know its coming you are crossing an international border and  no a drivers license won't do in this post 911 age.  How do I know this?  One time on my way to Canada I grabbed the blue passport out of my kitchen drawer and headed to the airport almost late for the plane.  It was then I discovered I had my son's blue passport and not mine but I had NO time to go back home and get mine without missing my plane.  So...I figured, "hey I'm Canadian how can they not let me in?"  Well let me tell you how.  I boarded the bus in Seattle for Vancouver, we got to the border and they wanted proof of citizenship.  I didn't have any of my Canadian documentation just my American Green card, which just wouldn't do.  I said good bye to my fellow passengers on the bus and proceeded to answer questions like where were you born, what high school did you go to?  Who can we call to verify you are who  you say you are...and on .. and on... and on.  This particular guard was very persistant and she wasn't going to let me go without a whole lot of work.  They called my sister who was waiting at the store to pick me up from the bus and she headed down to pick me up.  Well she gets to the border and the guard comes flying out and asks her 101 questions, meanwhile the other guards are saying "hey we would just let you in, obviously you are Canadian but it isn't our call what she does"  eventually she lets me go but she could have just as easily refused my entry which would have been a big hassel.  Believe me when I tell you, I had my passport fedex'd to me overnight international the next day (one I took out a second mortgage to pay for it and curried every favor I could find)  I got home safely but they could  have easily stopped me going into the US because I had shoes that looked to new and I didn't declare them..  it happens -my advice is don't mess with them.
2.Leave enough time
In this day and age when we are rushing through everything and standing in a line for 15 minutes at the doctors office is unacceptable, sometimes we just want to swoop in just in time for the plane.  I have one little word for you.  Security.  It is all depending how many palnes are leaving the airport at the same time you are.  Trust me there are going to be lines...lots of lines.  To be safe factor in at least 45 minutes wait at the border especially and I say this with certainty, if they say the line ups are 15 minutes or less...now when you get to the airport you have to factor in more time for the security line, because it is always longer than you expect -especially if you are running late, because they may decide that you are the one whose luggage needs to be checked, and you need to make time for the undressing, belt, shoes, jacket, computer, loose change and everything else that isn't physically attached to you, then you need to make time for the redressing and repacking all those same items.  Also leave enough time to traverse the airport in search of your gate.  Airports like Dallas and Atlanta, you can walk for a very long time.
3.Have your documents passport and everything out ahead of time for security and make sure you stay with the people you are travelling with.  Alot of time security won't want to break a family up and will do them all together.  In fact there is a family and first time passenger line sometimes and people don't realize it til they are half way through the long security line and they could get in the much smaller line up with their kids who are just running around the rope lines anyway. Have all your 3 ounces or less,  liquids in a ziploc bag that is easy to get out and ready for the xray machine.  You will save so much time!
4.Have good luggage.  Make sure that you have retractable handles not some wimpy luggage pull.  Your suitcase will fall over especially (and I know this for a fact) if you are on a subway and trying to board and get off quickly.  You will be ever so popular if you hold everyone up because your suitcase fell on its side.  I will write more on luggage in a future blog but just make sure its sturdy and well marked.  To avoid paying extra luggage fees you have some options.  A-fly on an airline that doesn't have any fees like southwest. B-Sometimes airlines will let you check two bags for the price of one and you can share the discount with another person -Midwest airlines (I miss their cookies!) C .Pay the full price for each bag but good lord don't let it go over 50 pounds or you are so screwed for the price goes up substantially.  D. Pack your 21 inch suitcase with only what you need, and you can take on two other peices, a purse and small bag.  The small bag has to fit under the seat in front of you so plan well and make sure everything you want during the plane ride is in the bag in front of you.  If it doesn't fit there it will have to get checked.  Usually if they have to check bags at the gate boarding the plane, they won't charge you cause they have to do alot of paperwork and possibly provide change.  Make sure all your paper work is on the plane with you in case you go to San Francisco and your baggage goes to Hong Kong.  Make sure you have a change of clothes, toiletries and medications and anything you can't live without in your overnight bag if you are checking your suitcase. Lastly pack some snacks in your overnight bag, if you can't live on pretzels and soda for your who knows how long flight, then get some granola bars or anything else dry including sandwiches, pretzels or candy.  Something that will tide you over till you get out of the arrival airport.  Heaven knows you don't want to have to stop in the terminal to get something to eat, unless you just won the lottery I suppose.
that's it kids-most of all have fun!

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